(AP) – Jack Wiley Dithers reporting.
When last we checked in on the New Journolisters, they were engaged in an erudite live analysis on election night 2010, courtesy of a chat room service hosted by National Public Radio (NPR). Shortly after our coverage, the NPR hosted chat room was shut down, and we lost track of the New Journolisters.
Recently, however, the New Journolisters and our cracker-jack investigative journalism team stumbled into one another again. It seems the New Journolisters are chatting it up again – on a server belonging to Obama For America (OFA). What they didn’t know is we have placed an entry level IT geek on the OFA staff, who is willing to do our bidding for a limitless supply of free Xbox games.
Herewith is a recent discussion thread.
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Ezra Klein: A principled conservative black man is now the GOP primary front runner. This could be an absolute disaster.
Joe Klein: If we lose the black community our only captive constituencies will be ditzy pseudo-socialites, overeducated pseudo-intellectuals, and illegals. Ideas?
Spencer Ackerman: Smash him through a plate glass window!
David Wiegel: Lynch the teabagging race traitor!
Jeffrey Toobin: Come on, guys, this is serious. Cain has a real tax reform plan. With details we can attack. A real tactical mistake on his part. Let’s get to work.
Jonathan Cohn: Let’s mock the 9-9-9 as 6-6-6. That should get under the skin of the religious right.
Paul Krugman: I ran some calculations and 6-6-6 is actually a lower effective tax rate than 9-9-9. This line of attack might backfire because it could become popular with the public.
David Brooks: I looked up his educational credentials on the Internet. Nothing from the Ivy League – we need to tar him as not belonging to the educated class.
Eugene Robinson: No, better to attack him as not really black.
Maureen Dowd: That might backfire too. Unlike Obama, both of Cain’s parents are really black.
Joe Klein: I think we’re stuck on this one, let’s move on to something else and come back to this later.
Ezra Klein: Good idea fake dad (/sarc). What can we do to pump up OccupyWallStreet?
Spencer Ackerman: We should arrange to have an occupier jump through a plate glass window, and blame the cops.
David Wiegel: No, blame a teabagger! Sarah Palin!
Jeffrey Toobin: Has anybody actually gone down there and talked to somebody?
Maureen Dowd: Ick!
Eugene Robinson: Too many white people. It scares me.
David Brooks: I haven’t seen a single photo of anybody with a decent pants crease. No way I’m talking to anybody that looks like that.
Edward T. Hall III: Help us!
Joe Klein: We need to move on, folks.
Ezra Klein: How do we help defuse the ‘Fast and Furious’ scandal?
Spencer Ackerman: Smash Darrell Issa through a plate glass window!
David Wiegel: Claim we can trace all the guns to Sarah Palin's church!
Eugene Robinson: Spin Issa as a racist for investigating Eric Holder.
Jonathan Cohn: Spin Issa as homophobic for not investigating Barney Frank.
Maureen Dowd: Spin Issa as misogynistic for not investigating Nancy Pelosi.
David Brooks: I found out from the Internet that Issa dropped out of high school. Let’s take the educated class angle.
Paul Krugman: Easy! It was just stimulus for Mexico. It would have worked if we had only spent more!
Mr. Soros: Damn it! I’m shutting this thing down right now!
