So, you’ve stumbled onto my humble little blog. Perhaps you are a Millenial wondering why most of your friends aren’t fully employed. Or wondering why ObamaKare is being shoved down your throat. Or why your generation is on the hook for a national debt that stands at $17 $18 Trillion and counting. Maybe you are scratching your head wondering why your President thinks Global Warming the weather is more worrisome than Islamic Terror. And perhaps you’ve started to become aware there might be something the corrupt and biased lame stream media isn’t telling you. The answer, to these and other existential questions, is ... the Left - specifically, the modern American Progressive. Think of this site as a portal to a richer understanding of this answer, a portal purposely designed with a consciously cock-eyed bent to keep it entertaining. Because the First Amendment is forever and the Internet never forgets. (Plus you better figure out FICA isn't the name of a Swedish bikini model, before she eats your entire paycheck.)

How to use the portal? You could dive into my archive*. I was most active here 2010-2012, but that matters not. How many times do I need to demonstrate the central point? To wit, the political / ideological Left is a menace to the constitutional republic and must be resisted lest the American experiment in liberty devolve into socialist dystopia. If it's the more pointed hand-to-hand combat of the comment board that whets your appetite, click the 'My Disqus Comments' widget. I continue to visit that world from time to time as a light diversion. Or you could browse through my blog roll. It's a very representative collection of center-right blogs, though hardly exhaustive. I can't do the political / ideology thing 24x7, and you probably can't either. Leave that to the hysterical, talking point chanting, mob agitating, race baiting, election stealing, gaia worshiping, straw man torching, Islamic Terrorist appeasing, organized Left (aka OFA, MSNBC, UAW, SEIU, Think Progress, Media Matters, most of legacy media, the politically correct faculty lounge, anybody who belonged to Journolist, anybody connected to Occupy Wall Street, anything funded by George Soros or Tom Steyer, their paid Internet trolls, and the rest of the usual Team Leftie suspects).

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Tuesday, July 20, 2010

An Insider’s View of White House Campaign Strategy

(AP) – Jack Wiley Dithers reporting.

Our cracker-jack investigative journalism team has acquired audio tape from a campaign strategy meeting recently held at the White House. If it were a video tape, or at least a high quality audio tape, we would have sold it to Breitbart. However, the audio recording device was stuffed inside our White House source’s shoe, so this transcript will have to do.

Unidentified Voice: Somebody wake up Harry.

Harry Reid: {snort!} {ack!} THIS WAR IS LOST!

Nancy Pelosi: {sigh} Wrong election, Harry.

Joe Biden: OK, Barack is out on the trail stumping for a candidate, so I’m in charge here.

James Clyburn: [sounding sarcastic] Who’s the lucky bastard? Hope it’s Alvin Greene.

{entire room laughs heartily}

Joe Biden: Gibbsy, you takin’ minutes?

Robert Gibbs: {mutters something under breath}

Nancy Pelosi: You’re lucky to have the job, Baghdad Bob.

Joe Biden: OK, let’s get started.

{Sound of door opening. Sound of ‘Hail to the Chief’ playing from an iPod speaker.}

Joe Biden: What are you doing here?

Barack Obama: Greene couldn’t cover the campaign event, because the Senate didn’t approve his UI check soon enough.

Barack Obama: OK, let’s get started. What are we doing here? Gibbsy, you got the agenda?

Robert Gibbs: {mutters something under breath}

Nancy Pelosi: What did I tell you?

Barack Obama: OK, who do we have on the conference line?

{15 seconds of silence}

Nancy Pelosi: {sigh} Do I have to do everything myself?

Beep! {Dial Tone} Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!

Machine Voice: Welcome to the White House Live Conferencing System. Press 1 to join a conference, press 2 to manage your personal account, press 3 to replay an old conference recording, press 4 to manage your recording options, press 5 to start a new conference, press 6 for more options.”


Machine Voice: Press 1 to enter your White House Live Conferencing System user id.

Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!

Machine Voice: Enter your White House Live Conferencing System password, followed by the pound sign.”

Barack Obama: Michelle, that’s your cue, heh-heh.

Michelle Obama: {mutters something under breath}

Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!

Nancy Pelosi: Who do we have on the conference?

George Soros: George.

Andy Stern: Andy here.

James Carville: [sounding agitated] What the hell took you so long! You gotta get somebody on that phone pad, man! You gotta show some leadership!

Bill Ayers: Can we just get started? I have to give a lecture on the history of domestic terrorism soon.

Barack Obama: OK, we got an election coming up and my poll numbers are in the tank …

Nancy Pelosi: [interrupting] Geez, it’s always about you, Barry. You’re not up this cycle, we are.

Harry Reid: Yeah, me too!

George Soros: You people are pathetic. Can I just get a report on what I’m getting for my Astro-Turf money?

David Axelrod: Yes, sir! There’s the Coffee Party …

George Soros: [interrupting] What a joke!

Valerie Jarrett: Well, we also have that “Other 95” thing …

George Soros: [interrupting] DOA! Plouffe, are you on the line?

David Plouffe: Yes, sir!

George Soros: Anything good from the Internet trolls?

David Plouffe: I think we’ve uncovered the identity of that ‘LibertyAtStake’ guy.

Click! Click!Click!Click!Click!

David Plouffe: Ah, here it is. OK, … our man ‘JournoListIsGreat’ has evidence his real name is …


David Plouffe: Hunter S. Thompson.

George Soros: {sigh} I’m outtahere. Talk to ‘ya next week.


James Carville: [sounding agitated] You gotta energize the base! Tell the illegal immigrants they won’t be able to get ice cream anymore! Get ‘em out to the polls! Get some Panthers out to those polls! Make sure everybody knows the TEA Party is full of racists! Make sure everybody knows BP is full of British people! Get Michelle out to some NAACP meetings! You gotta show some leadership here!

Andy Stern: I know just what to do. How many buses do you think you’ll need in November? 5, 6 thousand?

Barack Obama: Sounds about right. OK, what’s for lunch?

Michelle Obama: We’re having McDonald’s catered in. The kids wanted Happy Meals.

Jack Wiley Dithers reporting.
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  1. Excellent and very, very clever. I have a feeling this is closer the the truth than we can prove.

  2. This was great! And Maggie's right, too close to the truth.

  3. This is awful close to reality. Great post. Very funny.

  4. HAHA- I liked that- pretty sad though ;-(


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