Another Open Letter to Barack Hussein Obama

Dude, you are just not getting it.  People are getting frustrated.  But, don't worry, I'm still there for you.

It’s been one full week since I gave you the benefit of my advice on how to approach the second half of your first term of office.  Yet, there's some kind of failure to communicate here.  What part of “we don’t need your stinkin’ agenda” are you not getting?

For starters, that 60 minutes interview was just a mess. Hey, man, da Nile ain’t just a river in Egypt. In fact, some people are starting to think you are disconnected from reality.

Some have even concluded you must be an egomaniac. I don’t know, I’m thinking maybe it was the Greek columns that got perceptions off on the wrong foot.

Perception is everything, as you (of all people) must surely know. After all, you couldn’t possibly have thought your verifiable accomplishments and qualifications were up to running for President. Could you?

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One thing is certain - you don’t lack for confidence in your agenda. It wasn’t shaken by the thumpin’ you took in Virginia, New Jersey, and Massachusetts in a rapid succession of off-year elections. The beatin’ you took at the phony Blair House summit couldn’t shake it. Not even your party having its’ ass handed to it, in an electoral rebuke for the ages, seems to have shaken it.

OK, high marks for persistence – I’ll grant you that much. Unfortunately, I think it’s the kind of persistence my dog showed when I was trying to teach her the basic “sit-stay” commands. But, you know, she finally did get it. Hell, I’m even able to let her off leash once in awhile now. So, I guess I should hold out hope for you yet.

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You know, I should really be sympathetic to all the disadvantages you’ve had to overcome. You’ve never really held down a real job, much less met a payroll. You’ve had to endure all those close associations with convicted mobsters, convicted domestic terrorists, and Black Liberation Theology lunatics. And your education! Good God, what an utter disgrace of pseudo-intellectual Leftist indoctrination. Geez Louise, where am I supposed to start with a guy who thinks there are 57 states?

Maybe I should start with the basics, using words you yourself have used. Maybe I should get on your wavelength, meet you on your terms. We Won. Your seat is in the back for the next two years. Strap in and enjoy the ride. We’ll decide where compromise is possible.

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And I think I’ve come up with a few pretty good proposals where we can meet half way.

Here’s one - you get to keep all the provisions of ObamaCare that deal with tort reform and open up competition across state lines. Oh, there weren’t any? Well, then let’s just throw everything else out, then add the tort reform and the competition - and you can take credit for two big successes. You’re really good at that.

I also have a great “green” initiative I think we can agree on. Let’s eliminate the Education and Energy departments. Just imagine how much that will decrease the federal carbon footprint.

Take all the Education Department bureaucrats and re-train them to be public school teachers. Instant job stimulus and instant reduction in student/teacher ratios! Talk about a win-win-win!

Give each Energy Department bureaucrat a one year paid leave of absence to write and submit a proposal to the National Science Foundation for an alternative energy development project. They can even form into teams if they want. Who knows, we might get lucky and see a worthwhile project come out of it.  At minimum, you can at least get some good press for eliminating federal redundancy. I know how you like good press.

I think we can find common ground on the Bush tax cuts, as well. How's this?  If you let every single provision extend, I think we can arrange for you to avoid the embarrassment of a veto override. Deal?

Barry, you just have to learn how to play well with others or it’s going to be a very rough next two years.