So, you’ve stumbled onto my humble little blog. Perhaps you are a Millenial wondering why most of your friends aren’t fully employed. Or wondering why ObamaKare is being shoved down your throat. Or why your generation is on the hook for a national debt that stands at $17 $18 Trillion and counting. Maybe you are scratching your head wondering why your President thinks Global Warming the weather is more worrisome than Islamic Terror. And perhaps you’ve started to become aware there might be something the corrupt and biased lame stream media isn’t telling you. The answer, to these and other existential questions, is ... the Left - specifically, the modern American Progressive. Think of this site as a portal to a richer understanding of this answer, a portal purposely designed with a consciously cock-eyed bent to keep it entertaining. Because the First Amendment is forever and the Internet never forgets. (Plus you better figure out FICA isn't the name of a Swedish bikini model, before she eats your entire paycheck.)

How to use the portal? You could dive into my archive*. I was most active here 2010-2012, but that matters not. How many times do I need to demonstrate the central point? To wit, the political / ideological Left is a menace to the constitutional republic and must be resisted lest the American experiment in liberty devolve into socialist dystopia. If it's the more pointed hand-to-hand combat of the comment board that whets your appetite, click the 'My Disqus Comments' widget. I continue to visit that world from time to time as a light diversion. Or you could browse through my blog roll. It's a very representative collection of center-right blogs, though hardly exhaustive. I can't do the political / ideology thing 24x7, and you probably can't either. Leave that to the hysterical, talking point chanting, mob agitating, race baiting, election stealing, gaia worshiping, straw man torching, Islamic Terrorist appeasing, organized Left (aka OFA, MSNBC, UAW, SEIU, Think Progress, Media Matters, most of legacy media, the politically correct faculty lounge, anybody who belonged to Journolist, anybody connected to Occupy Wall Street, anything funded by George Soros or Tom Steyer, their paid Internet trolls, and the rest of the usual Team Leftie suspects).

*Re-posting encouraged. No need to ask for permission. Just follow the commonly accepted convention of acknowledging this site as original source with a link back. That way, you leave the asking for forgiveness to me.

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Thursday, August 8, 2013

Jack Wiley Dithers Exclusive: al-Qaeda Switching to ObamaPhones

(AP) - Jack Wiley Dithers Reporting
“If You Can’t Scoop It, Make It Up.”

My al-Qaeda mole recently contacted me via the double super secret encrypted (AP) communications channel we use. The conversation was a snap to transcribe. I just asked my PRISM mole to print it out for me.

al-Myass: You have to get me out of here.

JWD: Why? Is your cover blown?

al-Myass: No. The 5 wives are driving me nuts. 5 anniversaries, 5 birthdays, 5 mother in laws! Every time I turn around I'm under the gun. The worst is dinner time. Do you have any idea what it's like having 5 separate conversations about your day trying to pretend you like the cooking? I'm about to crack, man.

JWD: Try to hang in there.

al-Myass: And the meals are "halal." You know what that means? No alcohol. No alcohol! I can tell you how to get these people to stop thinking about blowing up buildings right now. Just tell them Mohammed invented beer and the world will become a paradise of peaceful coexistence over night.

JWD: Calm down. You must at least be getting some sex.

al-Myass: Meh. Screwing a potato sack with eyes gets real old real quick.

JWD: Geez, you are losing it. It'll be good for your cover. What have you got for me?

al-Myass: Now that the Obama administration has leaked sources and methods with that teleconference cover story, al-Qaeda is switching to ObamaPhones.

JWD: ObamaPhones? Aren't they traceable?

al-Myass: Maybe by PRISM, but certainly not by the Obama administration.

JWD: So, what's the big plan for escaping the PRISM net?

al-Myass: Jihadi leadership is meeting at a conference right now. In Taliban controlled Afghanistan. They are learning how to talk like inner city American drug dealers. Then they will have a specialized code for translating words and terms back to terror plots.

JWD: Aren't they worried about their English accents being a problem?

al-Myass: Not at all. They will have a dozen fake drug gangs in as many American cities set up in a couple of weeks. Should have DEA chasing its tail for years.

JWD: Clever devils! I'll get somebody on profiling ObamaPhone stores right away. Try not to murder somebody on assignment.

al-Myass: It ain't easy.

“If You Can’t Scoop It, Make It Up.”
(AP) - Jack Wiley Dithers Reporting

Update 1:15 pm

My contact in the Fairfax County PD reports MS-13 is facing stiff competition from a new Pakistani drug trafficking gang that seems to have sprung up out of nowhere.

Update 3:30 pm

LAPD Gang Units cleaning up two separate drive by shooting incidents. Crip leader and Blood leader shot dead 5 miles apart simultaneously. Eyewitness accounts say the unidentified third gang was wearing orange Gitmo style jump suits as colors.
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